It has not been a good week.

 

I’ve also been extremely busy at work. That, I am actually grateful for though.I am glad that I had the distraction of work because otherwise I would have spent most of the week wallowing in the sad.

 

I miss my kitty

 

In happier, unrelated news; i had a smallish get together on Saturday, January 24th.

 

Aaaahhhahahahahahaahahaa. I love Rob’s hair and the look on his face. Balthrop (in the background) looks appropriately imposing.

I also found root beer that apparently already belongs to me when Amy and I went to the store before the party.

Master Chief did her duty by protecting the last of the Jell-O shots.

We had a pretty good amount of people show up.

In this picture from L to R is James, Chad, Jeff, Weldon, Rebecca and Rob

Rebecca is making guacamole and James is cutting the Jack Daniels marinated skirt steak into strips for fajitas.

The boys played poker. Well…..tried to play poker. I kept yelling at them because they were too loud. 

From L to R is Lee, JB, Weldon, Chad and Chuckles

Later, Chard and Elysia stopped by. I’m really unsure what kind of look is on his face or exactly why it is there but I am oh so grateful that I caught it. It’s very grumpy old men.

Eventually we did make it upstairs to watch “The Fifth Element” JB (left) and Rob (right) yapped through the entire movie

Luke spent most of the evening playing either Garry’s Mod or CounterStrike. He did make an appearance downstairs a few times and watched part of the movie.

 

Speaking of Luke….

I am somewhat amused (in that “are you fucking kidding me” kind of way) to have received both of the following papers on the same day…

Luke – you didn’t do your homework and you had a whole week to do it!

Luke! You’re super smart and made it into LEAP!

I truly love this boy and I am amazed by what he can accomplish but it is days like this that i just want to throttle him.

 

I’m getting pretty tired so I think I’m going to phone it in with a couple of random pictures…

 

Odin is such a classy kitty.                                                  Eli is just a sleepy kitty.

 

 

i r serious jam; this r serious picture.

this r not serious picture.

 

Odin likes to think that this is his bed.

Eli Many Paws

 

Daddy and Luke

 

 

Luke, passed out on the couch.

 

 

Hercules first came into our lives at the very end of May of 1997. Barely 2 days old, he had been abandoned by his mother and subsequently rescued by the receptionist at our Vet’s office.

I was a few months pregnant with Luke at the time and was definitely feeling those motherly urges. Somehow, I convinced Steve that we should take him home.

As we got back in the truck that day, the Elton John CD we were listening to started back up again. Blaring through the speakers was the song “Hercules”. Steve said we should name the kitten Hercules.

I laughed at the thought of this tiny kitten being named Hercules. He was so small and delicate!

Little did I know that he would grow to be a behemoth of a cat.

Hercules has been a part of my life for the better part of 12 years and has been the one thing always by my side.

When I was terrified of being a horrible mother; Hercules was there.

When Steve whistled or sang a little tune; Hercules would come running.

On those cold lonely nights when Steve was deployed; Hercules was there.

On the lonelier nights after Steve and I went our separate ways; Hercules was there.

When Luke was spending time with his Dad and I was alone; Hercules was there.

On the big gamble move from Spokane to Redmond; Hercules was there.

When it came time to discipline Odin; Hercules was there.

When Doug and I drove from Seattle to San Diego as part of my move to Dallas; Hercules was there.

When I moved from my rental into my very first “all mine” home; Hercules was there.

 

He was and still is an amazing cat and I am grateful that he chose to spend his life with me.

He never refused a cuddle and was certain that every plastic bag held catnip.

He had a crinkly ear from a cyst removal many years ago. It made him look gentle and sweet even when he was irritated.

Even in his younger more spry days; he never once jumped on a counter but he would defend his coffee table from the pesky kittens by dragging them off by the scruff of their necks.

I will miss you Hercules. Thank you for being my rock of stability for the past 12 years.

 

I am warmed by the knowledge that you are no longer uncomfortable

and are happily chirping for catnip across the rainbow bridge……

 

With love and sincere gratitude for all my days…

 

~jam

 

This was a Facebook thing….

1) There are only a handful of people in the world that I trust.

2) I am certain that everyone talks about me behind my back.

3) Sometimes I look at Luke in awe and tell myself how incredibly lucky I am.

4) No, I’m not working 12 hour days because I think I need to; I do it because I like to.

5) The cat just stole my hair tie. I can’t put anything down without it being "catted"

6) If I didn’t have my heating pad, I would be miserable.

7) Sometimes I consider my sensitivity a curse, despite the fact that I’ve learned to make it a strength.

A friend once told me that I was a walking dichotomy. I didn’t fully understand him until I realized how different I am outside of work. If don’t notice a difference, you’re not as close to me as you think.

9) I am fiercely traditional when it comes to relationships. I tend to get very upset if I am not able to serve/tend to my significant other or if my attempts to do so are rejected (regardless of the reason).

10) I routinely avoid going down aisles in the grocery store if there is a “sample lady” there, even if I need something in that aisle.

11) Some days; I come home from work, get changed, get a snack and lay on the couch with my heating pad for the entire night. It isn’t because I’m lazy, I’m just so wiped out by the end of the day that I can’t do anything else.

12) I finished painting the ½ bath, hung the new mirror and the freshly painted cabinet tonight.

Old                                                          New

Old                                                          New

13) I need so much more external validation than I get.

14) At work, I like to be in charge. Running things energizes me like nothing else does.

15) I am much harder on Luke than I need to be for him to succeed, but I don’t want him to just succeed. I want him to excel and have a huge impact on the world around him.

16) I cannot remember any of my young childhood; save for the stories my family tells me. This is one of the reasons why I document so many trivial things with photographs. I am terrified that I will not remember the days I am living now.

17) Anything that has a numerical counter (volume, timer) must be set in intervals of 5.

18) I have incredibly sensitive hearing and cannot stand sounds that most people find relaxing such as white noise and fans. I cannot tolerate the sound of metal on metal.

19) I am an incredible cook.

20) I have a very limited amount of patience in most areas except relationships.

21) I am fascinated by the period of history marked by the Nazis and that of Hiroshima.

22) I clench my jaw so much that my face aches most of the time.

23) I like to sit in the car in the heat of summer with the windows rolled up. There is something about the oppressive heat that relaxes me.

24) I have a hard time completing a task if I am focused on only one thing.

25) I refuse to give up. Ever.

Back in November, when Luke and I bought the house, bought a bunch of paint at Home Depot.

The only rooms in the house that were painted were completely icky.

The kitchen was this awful peach color. I found the paint can the other day. The color was called “Apricot Glow”.

 

Luke’s room was pink. Well…it’s still pink but it has a swatch of the gray that I intend to paint it at some point.

Every other room was builder’s grade eggshell white. Yay personality.

After painting the kitchen and the accent area above the fireplace a beautiful deep chocolate brown, the half bath downstairs was next.

Last weekend, I removed the cabinet from the wall. This was not a smart thing for me to do by myself, but I wanted it done. It’s one of those big kitchen cabinets; about 3×3.5 and all kinds of heavy.

A few weeks ago, i replaced the faucet from the builder’s grade crap to a pretty brushed metal classic faucet.

Here’s the old one….

Here is the new one…

The other day I picked up a cheap mirror at Ross. The gold color wouldn’t have worked in the bathroom but a little spray paint fixed that right up.

Here is the original mirror:

All taped up an nowhere to go:

 

Spray painted (no I didn’t paint it on the couch):

The final product:

Once the paint dried, I used steel wool to dull the surface and bring some of the original finish back. It came out pretty well. I need to put a coat of clear coat on it before I put it in the bathroom.

The old mirror obviously needed to come down. This proved to be a challenge. I took off the clips but apparently they were decorative because the mirror was attached to the wall with what I can only assume was some kind of super top secret government grade adhesive. Probably the same stuff they used to keep little Georgie’s mittens attached to his coat.

Old mirror aka My Nemesis:

I realized that I would need to pry the mirror off the wall. What to use…what to use….

Screwdriver? No…not flat/long enough

Butterknife? Hmmm…pretty flat and long but not very flexible. Oh, I tried it but it didn’t do much.

Think..think…

Oh yes. You are a genius.

Offset spatula.

It was at this point that I realized that as I was prying the mirror off the wall
; there was a good chance that it would shatter and leave me somewhat bloody and lacerated.

Safety first!

I used duct tape to cover the mirror in a lattice pattern. If the mirror did break, the duct tape would have kept it from shattering and flying in my non glass shard friendly face. I was too intent on the task at hand to take a picture, but you get the idea.

It took quite awhile to get the right leverage to start pulling the adhesive away. By this point, I was boiling hot because I was 2 inches away from the lights. I would have turned them off, but then…well….it would have been dark.

i did burn my arm on one of the light-bulbs but it only got a little red.

At last, I heard the distinctive sound of paper ripping. I had to force myself to apply slow steady pressure rather than yank the spatula.

There was some breakage, but not too much. I didn’t intend to keep the mirror so it’s not a big deal at all.

The adhesive tore the paper off the drywall, but again; I am not concerned. Another mirror will be going over that spot so I did not bother to patch the drywall.

 

 

The bathroom was fully prepped for paint. I hate prepping to paint, but it saves so much time/hassle that it is worth it.

It took a lot of moving about to not only prep, but paint the room. It’s a small under the stair half bath so the ceiling is angled. I needed to use a ladder to reach the higher places but didn’t have a lot of room to manipulate the ladder within the bathroom. This meant a lot of stretching and cursing.

At anyrate, the first coat is finished. I’ll do a second coat tomorrow.

This is the ceiling with the angled wall. Yes, I know how to cut in without the help of painter’s tape but the tape makes it easier.

This is a pretty crappy picture.

Right now, the bathroom appears to be very dark and overwhelmingly green. I am reserving judgment however because nothing has been put back in the bathroom yet. The cabinet will be painted a seashell color which will brighten up the dark area quite a bit.

The mirror will also help.

The previous accessories (soap dish, towel ring, toity paper holder) are a black wrought iron. I intend to seashell them as well.

I think that when it is all finished, it will be very nice.

For now, I am very hurty (and a bit smelly) but I’m proud of what I accomplished today.

I kind of forgot to eat after my migraine went away (I can’t eat while I have a migraine; it’s like throwing food directly in the toity).

Luke and I had “bad for us” food for dinner and now I’m snacking on some almonds.

I just realized that it is almost 1am. I really should go to bed.

Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!

 

   

 

 

1. Learn to sew

2. Learn to knit

3. Lose 60 pounds

4. Save 10% of each check by year’s end

5. Eat meals with Luke, without the TV on and at the table

6. Walk at least 1 mile, at least 4 times a week

7. Visit Mom2 at least once a week

8. Visit my sister and get to know her family.

9. Watch more movies

10. Attend/Visit one educational/cultural event a month

 

 

It was quite an interesting 2 weeks in the magnificent North East.

 

 

Luke and I left home on November 21 to spend Thanksgiving with my family. We were scheduled to fly back on December 1; giving us plenty of time to spend with family and friends.

Everything was going well until we left the house to get in the cab to go to the airport.  

The driver arrived 10 minutes early (and yes, he did try to charge me for the waiting time) and huffed impatiently when Luke and I finally came outside.

He asked me where we were going information I had already provided to the dispatcher). I told him we were headed to DFW to the Delta terminal.

He said, “Do you know how to get there from here?”

I replied “Um. No. I thought you’d know that as you’re driving the cab.”

Snottily he said, “Well, I don’t cover this area, I had to come pick you up from Dallas. You live here, you should know the way.”

Mentally stabbing him in the eyes with my keys, “I’ve lived here for 2 weeks. I don’t know the best way to get there from here.”

“Fine, but I’ll just have to take the long way.”

Smelling a ruse to charge me more from a mile away, I replied “Perhaps it would be a good idea to familiarize yourself with this area if you have to work here occasionally so that your passengers do not have to pay more money when you take the long way.”

He did not get a tip.

Halfway to the airport, I realized that I had forgotten both my book and all ALL the DS games on the counter. Craptastic.

We did have time to go back and get them, but I wasn’t about to ask Mr. “I drive a cab but rely on the passengers for directions” to turn around and go back.

Luke had “Purrpals” in his DS and I had “Cooking Mama” in mine. Whee.

Arriving at the airport without incident, I handed the cabbie my debit card and he looked at me as if I had given him a broken crack pipe.

“No cash?”

“No.”

“This will take at least 15 minutes to process.”

“No it won’t. I have used credit/debit cards before and it takes about 2 minutes.”

“That is not true,” as he shuffles off to his car.

5 minutes later, he hands me the slip to sign and I made a noticeable “X” through the tip line, wrote in the amount of the fare and signed it.

I really wanted to stick my tongue out at him.

 

 

We took our bags over to the curbside check-in and to my surprise, didn’t have to pay to check our bags there.

Boarding passes in hand; we went through a super quick security line and walked the 19 miles to our gate.

On the way, we passed one of those little airport stores that rented DVDs. That comes into play later.

At the gate, we found a place to plug in my phone and laptop to charge them up.

My mind wandered back to that little DVD rental store and I asked Luke if he thought they sold DS games…..

Turns out that they did!

Seven games and too much money later, I triumphantly returned with my treasure and we were both thrilled.

I picked up the following: The Price Is Right, Sims Creator, Sims My Kingdom, Crosswords, Word Games, Lego Batman and Spore Creature Creator.

 

 The flight to Hotlanta and then to PA were smooth and uneventful.

 

 Collecting the bags however proved to be a challenge of my vow not to kill anyone.

We followed to rest of the sheep to the baggage area and waited for the thingers to start up and deliver unto us our precious clothing and toothbrushes.

It started.

Then it stopped. Three airport “workers” came over to stand and look at it for a while. Two were 20 something wanna be gangstas and the other was a 30 something “I don’t comprehend that I’m not 17 anymore and can TOTALLY fit in these pants” diva.

They talked on their radios for a while. Loudly.

Finally, and older and clearly more competent gentleman came over and did some things and talked on his radio and did more things and then the thinger started again.

We waited. Bags came.

It stopped again.

They announced that the bags would now be coming on the thinger next to that one.

That one started. More bags came. Not ours mind you, but more bags did come.

After about 10 minutes, most of the people were gone and our bags still had not shown up. About 1/2 the people from our flight were still there, getting more and more agitated as the same duct taped suitcase rolled around the thinger.

I went over the diva to ask about our bags.

“Excuse me, but are all the bags from Dallas out? There are quite a few folks, including me still waiting.”

“Djoohaveyer baggage claim ticket?”

I pulled it out of my pocket and before I could even get a word out…

“You isn’t in the right place. You need to go ova dere,” as she points in the general direction of downtown Philadelphia.

*seethes*

“Where?”

“BAGGAGE CLAIM 4. Onthelef.” Partially yelled, partially dribbled.

*mumbles something about selective sterilization*

I grabbed Luke and we went over to the right baggage thinger, collected our bags and popped outside to catch the shuttle to Avis.

Holy. Mother. Of. Gawd.

Cold. Not chilly. C-O-L-D. I checked the temperature. It was 27 degrees. I checked the temperature at Mom’s house. 17 degrees. Crap. Frozen crap on a frozen stick.

 

Despite my overwhelming desire to go back inside and spend Thanksgiving in the Philadelphia International Airport with Diva and the Gangsta Boiz; we got on the shuttle to Avis.

 

 Got Jeep. Found hotel. Hotel was fine, plain and uneventful.

 

 Nice view though. I do love the city lights at night.

 

By this time, it was about midnight. Neither of us had eaten and we were starved. Tired and starved. Eventually starved won out.

Luckily, there was a Wawa (!) close by so Luke and I braved the frigid (shut up, I live in Texas now) temperatures to get something to eat.

 

 I was driven by the fact that I knew there would be Tasty Kakes at Wawa. I would do just about anything for Butterscotch Krimpits.

Luke was immediately impressed by:

a) the number of people in Wawa at 12:30 in the morning

b) the number of cops outside (yay downtown Philly!)

c) the cups of salami and cheese next to the cups of carrots and celery

d) the tasty kakes

e) the tasty kakes 

I also picked up a bag of Herr’s Salt and Vinegar chips because Luke loves salt and vinegar chips and I knew these would make him have the vinegar equivalent of “bitter beer face”.

Back at the hotel, we watched an infomercial for that flat iron that straightens your wet hair while nourishing it and I think also feeding the world’s hungry and solving Sudoku puzzles.

We were due to meet my high school friend Sherwood at 10 the next (hah) morning so we got to sleep soon after the salami, cheese, tasty kake and chip fest was over.

The next morning we dressed and headed downstairs to put the luggage in the Jeep and meet Sherwood. Text messages confirmed that he was on his way (walking! nutcase) and Luke and I warmed up the Jeep while waiting.

There was ice. I don’t like ice that isn’t in my freezer ready to keep my drinks cold.

 

 

Sherwood arrived and we headed to a coffee shop because…well…no functiony without the caffeine and such.

Sherwood and I caught up over a nice breakfast of coffee and a muffin for me, hot chocolate and a sticky bun for luke and coffee and a breakfast sandwich for Sherwood.

 

 

 

He gave us some free passes to the Mutter museum and we parted ways. It was great to see him again. I always knew he’d turn out to be one of those “cool adults” that everyone thinks they are but really aren’t.

I don’t know why I don’t have a picture of Sherwood. It is awfully odd. Here is one that I stole from his Facebook page.

Luke and I offered him a ride home, but he declined saying that he could catch a bus.

We drove around Philly for awhile so I could show a bit of the city to Luke. The last time he was in Philadelphia, he was a tad young

The two of us headed to the museum and found it without much trouble. Parking however proved to be a challenge and we ended up parking in a pay lot about 46 miles away from the museum.

I pulled into a spot and the attendant barreled out of his little heated attendant house and waved his arms at me as if I had just run over a puppy carrying the cure for cancer.

He told me to park in a different spot. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why, but I really didn’t care because I was rapidly losing both flesh and brain cells to the freezing cold.

Paid and still nutty, the attendant retreated to his steamy pay lot house and Luke and I headed to the museum. On the way, we passed a titty bar that had half-naked girly pictures in the window. That matters later.

We reached the museum where a completely new adventure began.

 

wait. i can’t start this until i get my stupid latpop to recognize my Zune like it’s done for the past YEAR.

 

While unpacking, I came across a 6 page unfinished letter that I wrote to Luke when he was about 1 1/2 years old.

I haven’t read it yet so I thought I’d take the time to transcribe it here. I’ve put a couple pics in from when Luke was younger too.

                                                                            ♥

Lucas,

I am writing you this letter to let you know how things are going. Today is May 19th, 1999. You are 19 months and 9 days old. You have become quite the handful at home.

Your Daddy is in Moron, Spain right now. He has been gone since February 19th. Today is exactly 90 days. Hopefull he will be back in one month. There are rumors going around that he might not be back until August 19th. That means three more months instead of one.

I really miss him and you do too. You haven’t been behaving very well. For some reason you don’t want to listen to me. You also like to throw all your food on the floor. You refuse to stay in your bed.

On the other hand, you are absolutely adorable. You got your first haircut a few weeks ago adn you look so handsome. You are very smart for your age. You are always doing something new. You have a great vocabulary and you learn new words everyday. Tou have started to learn body parts. You know your noes, eyes, mouth, belly and feet. You can undress yourself almost all the way now.

Right now you are playing with your friend Tawni. She live across the street from us. Right now we are in Washington state at Fairchild Air Force Base. It is about 15 miles from Spokane, Wa. You and Tawni play together all the time. She is about six months older than you but you usually get along well. I bought you a whole bunch of care the other day and taught you how to make a vroom vroom sound when you push them.

Well, Tawni’s Mom just got here. I’ll write more later.
 

Right now I am talking to Amy Brown. She has a son who is about a month younger than you. You like to play with Mason. Sometimes you just like to play alone. You can be very solitary when you want to be. We put a gate up across the door of your room. You know how to open it but you are not strong enough to yet.

 

You have learned how to do quite a few things that are not so good. You have learned how to climb on your changing table and pull everything off the wall. You als like to pull everything out of your closet. I bought some door knob covers so you can’t open the doors. They would work very well if I would remember to actually close the closet door when I am changing your diaper.

I keep your diapers in the closet because you were forever pulling them off your table. I am trying really hard to keep you in line. You are not an easy child to parent. You are already showing signs of being very independent and at times rather defiant. You are a challenge to me. Fortunately, I thrive on challenges.

I have been taking you to daycare everyday because I need some time to myself. Also, you need to interact with other kids. With your Dad away, things have gotten really rough. I got out of the military on April 14th of 1999. I actually took a vacation starting on March 4th so I have been home for 2 1/2 months now. I hate being at home all the time. I love spending time with you, but I don’t like being at home all the time. I need to work somewhere. I am just not cut out for the housewife deal. I hope that when you are married you will not have a problem with your  wife working if she wants to!

Of course, if she doesn’t want to, I hope that you have a good job when you get to that point in your life. I hope you do well, I really do. You are going to be an amazing person when you grow up. I hope that you realize that.

Life is not easy. Sometimes I know you must feel like nothing you do is right. I feel like that sometimes. Then I look at you and your Dad and realize that you are the most important things in my life. I love you both so much. I hope that you end up as happy as I am. Well, now that I got that off my chest let’s move on.

You are taking a bath right now. I got you some foam rubber letters and numbers but all you will say is “i”. Oh well, it will come with time. You speak very well and are really polite. You almost always say please and thank-you. You talk all the time; although I still can’t understand what you say most of the time. The words you do say are very clear though.

You really are a good kid. I love you more than you could ever know. I want you to know that even though you may not like me very much sometimes because of the way I punish you or don’t let you do things, I really do know what is best for you. I want you to know that you can come to me with anything. I promise not to jedge you harshly. If you have questions about sex, drugs, alcohol, life, school…anything. I mean it. Whatever problems you might have are my problems too. I just want you to know that.

I just put you in bed a few minutes ago. Of course, you promptly got right out of bed. It has been a real struggle to get you to stay in your bed. My only consolation is that you will have the same problem with your child. That may sound cruel, but you will understand one day. Well that is all for today. I love you.

Well, I talked to your Dad tonight. I looks like he will be gone until August. He originally was supposed to only be gone for a week or so. That turned into a month and that turned into 4 months. Now that turned into 6 months. They also are not paying him as much anymore. He was getting 11 dollars a day. They bumped it up to 35.50 a day and now the want to drop it back to 11 dollars again. Also, they won’t keep him for 180 days, only 170 because if they kept him for 180 it would be a short your and they would have to let him go to any base he wants to.

He was talking about getting out early once I get settled in my job. I really miss your Dad. i am so lucky to have you here. You remind me of him. You are just as stubborn as he is. When you are stubborn though it is mostly cute. You know, sometimes I am really scared that i am going to do xomething wrong and screw your life up. I really hope that when you are old enough to understand this letter you don’t think I was a bad mother.

I really hope you had a good childhood and you don’t have any bad memories. I just want you to konw that I did the best I could. I was young when you were born. You were a suprise for us, but don’t think for one minutes that you weren’t wanted. We loved you from the moment we found out that we were going to have you. We didn’t know if you were a boy or a girl. We wanted a boy and we got one! Were we ever happy!

Well, your Daddy just called so I have to go….

                                                                            ♥

 

How did we get from that little kid to this….