Archive for August, 2010

On perspective

I realized today that I will very likely not change the world but I can damn sure change the way I see it.

Something is happening in my head.

Something evolutionary.

Revolutionary? No. Not in the grand scheme of things. People do this every day.

When I went to lunch today, I held the door for a woman who didn’t say thank you. She didn’t even seem to register that I had held the door, she didn’t even look at me. I responded in the way that I’m used to. In my snottiest voice, the one that will make your insides quiver, I said “You’re Welcome”. She stopped at stared at me with daggers in her eyes. I was furious.

Of course I tweeted about it. I wanted everyone to know about this injustice.

Then, as I was reading through the responses. I started replying to one. Almost without even thinking. I do that a lot, respond without thinking. It’s not the talking out my ass response though. I’m good at talking to people, I don’t have to spend time pouring over what to say.

I started typing something to the effect of “in retrospect I shouldn’t have said it with any attitude…” Mid keystroke it hit me.

I shouldn’t have done that.

I don’t mean it hit me in the sense that I was responding with something that I didn’t mean. I knew I shouldn’t have said that. I knew it logically. When it hit me though, I knew it somewhere else. I don’t know where.

It was just different.

I’m not making any grand promises about sweeping changes. I’m just going to see where this takes me and for once I’m going to let go of the reins.